Save thousands on any new car (Australia-only): Did you like this report? You can help support the channel, securely via PayPal:
Meet the Lawrence family. They buy a 2013 Grand Cherokee shitbox - used - from a shitbag Jeep Dealer - and they buy is a couple of years old, in 2015. Henceforth, they get it serviced on time - every time.
Then one day recently the Lawrence’s seven-slot shitheap takes its first big, steaming dump in traffic, and coasts to a halt, inelegantly, at the roadside.
Danny Lawrence takes his zombiefied Jeep back to the arsehole dealership. Things aren’t looking too bad even at this point - they’re making noises about replacing the battery.
That’s ‘only’ about $600. See what I mean about the pricing? That’s $478.41 - for a friggin battery. And almost $100 to fit it. And lubrication is extra.
Then they inform Mr Lawrence the fuel pump is cactus, and - added bonus - the debris from its trouser-pooping proclivity has migrated downstream and destroyed the fuel injectors.
There are of course sundry additional costs associated with resolving these newfound issues:
That’ll be $47,500. The repair cost is roughly double the current valuation.
Fiat Chrysler tells the Lawrences to eff off, on the goodwill front, predictably enough.
And every independent mechanic Mr Lawrence approaches runs screaming from the proposition of placing their hands upon this disaster - because Jeeps are notoriously such dodgy shitheaps to work on.
The law says products must be reasonably durable. That’s regardless of warranty status. This means (as I see it) that a well maintained car should simply not shit itself within six years if it’s been serviced properly. And if it does, this must be the manufacturer’s problem, not yours.
Fiat Chrysler is not commenting - allegedly because a complaint is currently with Fair Trading. Which is a shallow, convenient, bullshit excuse for not getting out in front of this issue and doing the right thing.
And I’d say to you, that’s just not good enough in 2019. It’s not a matter before the court, you Fiat Chrysler Muppets. You’re not gagged by contempt legislation. You’re choosing not to comment because any statement you’d make would simply illuminate your ultimate cock status.
Fiat Chrysler refuses to see that this conduct is injuring the brand. (That sandpaper dildo guarantee. Yesssss!) See, Jeep was looking good as recently as 2014. Incredibly, they inflicted 30,408 seven-slot shitboxes on ‘Strayans in that year. 2014. But after a raft of bad publicity, sales had atrophied to just 7325 in last year. And they’re another 20 per cent off the pace so far this year. Still in freefall. An 80 per cent reduction in five years. Incredible, I think you’d agree.
Speaking of morality, remember 36-year-old Martin Shkreli? He’s the big hedge fund scumbag who raised the price of the antiparasitic drug Daraprim from about $13 to about $750 - $US - per pill.
How ironic - the guy ramping the price of an antiparasitic drug being self-evidently the biggest parasite imaginable. It’s perfect. Anyway, he’s in federal prison for securities fraud, and he got fined more than $7 million as well. So that’s nice.
There’s a parallel here. The Jeep costs $50k brand new. This price includes the cost of a high pressure fuel pump, the fuel rail and the injectors. They’re in there, under the hood, when you buy the car, right? Therefore, how can it possibly cost $47,500 to replace just those few components? Where, exactly on the moral arc does that pricing structure sit?
I get that parts need to be profitable. It’s a business, keeping cars on the road. But just the parts here, for this repair, are more than $40,000. That is just indefensible. They’re been Shkrelified.
This is the Martin Shkreli spare parts pricing strategy. $750 per pill. Just as morally defensible. That family has a mortgage. Two kids to feed. They don’t have $50k lying around, guaranteed. And Fiat Chrysler does not have to sell those parts at anything like that Shkrelified price to make a reasonable margin.
To you Fiat Chrysler dirtbags Down Under I say, emphatically: Pack up and piss off back to Detroit. (Or is that Turin?) It’s so hard to keep track of who’s screwing who. You and your outrageously immoral conduct are no longer welcome Down Under.
This kind of disgraceful, anti-consumer corporate conduct has to stop.
0 Comments