This holiday season I want to give you the gift of being able to enhance the quality of your interactions with friends and loved ones. The holiday season is a time where we often gatherwith family and friends.
Well often this is a joyful occasion… There are times when friction or frustrations arise that can create strain within relationships.
In a recent office meeting, one of our agents talked about her sister that visits during holidays.
In the past, those visits sometimes turn to friction as she deals with her sisters opinions and judgments about her marriage...
That friction often turns into angry interactions between the two of them and ultimately leads to a disappointing visit... Which, overtime, create distance between the two of them.
This holiday season however, our agent is determined to have a higher quality of connection between she and her sister...
This season , she will be practicing at technique That we teach in our mastery course is called “Trade your expectations for appreciation”.
There’s a moment where the other person will say something (or have a certain look) that we interpret in a negative way....
If we interpret that comment or look in a negative or disempowering way, will typically have an emotional sensation to go along with it… It may be frustration, anger, bitterness, annoyance or dismissiveness.
If we react or speak from that emotional place, there is a predictable outcome that will occur from that interaction.
You see, we all want to be loved and appreciated and respected. The expectations we have of our family and friends is even greater.
However, a fundamental fact is that we all express love, appreciation, and even concern differently.
We tend to expect that others love and concern for us be done in a way that we most appreciate.
When it is not, or we interpret it differently, that tends to lead to upset.
What if, instead, in that moment that you begin to experience frustration, hurt, anger or upset… What is in that moment you interrupted the pattern and asked yourself what is there to appreciate, if I were to really look, about the other person.
If you really invested a few moments to really look at all the things there are to appreciate about the other person instead of focusing on your interpretation of what was said or done, your reaction or response will likely be much different from a place of appreciation.
Often, when a family member or friend is expressing concern and your response is one of appreciation… It tends to allay their initial concern to begin with… They feel like their message is actually being received and often the intensity with which they try to reach you diminishes.
Trading Expectations for Appreciation has the power to deliver substantially more joyous interactions.
Try it yourself!
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